Ain’t Ain’t Proper

Happy New Year–January 1, 2014.  Wow!  2013 was a year of ups and downs, highs and lows, trials and victories!  For me, the biggie was I clocked in at seventy!  Yikes!  Hence I’ve thought a lot about Psalm 90:13 and mankind’s allotted three score and ten years, not in a maudlin way but in an honest evaluation of my days.  As I told a friend, “From now on, I’ve climbed aboard the gravy train–all is gravy from here on out.”  

My dad didn’t make it much past sixty; my son, a mere two days.  My mom lived ’till almost ninety.  Like David in Psalm 39:4,5 Message, I’m tempted to ask, “Tell me what’s going on, God? How long do I have to live?”  

Three years ago, I’d exhausted the last antibiotic available for me following a third bout of pneumonia in three months time. In desperation I consulted a specialist who’s dire prediction for my future left me with little hope of survival. When I returned to my car I leaned my head against the steering wheel and wept–not a wail or a cry in anger, or begging God for salvation, just a flood of hopeless tears.  ‘This is it,’ I thought. I saw little beyond the new year.

Suddenly I heard a noticeably deep baritone Voice call my name.  His voice filled the car’s interior.  I lifted me head and did a 360′ check to see who might be standing near my car.  No one was. Emphatically the Voice called again.  “Kay, it ain’t over until I say it’s over!”

I laughed aloud.  “It ain’t over ’till I say it’s over?”  As a long time grammar teacher and as a professional  writer, that Someone, even an Unseen Voice would use the word ‘ain’t’ tickled my imagination.  I laughed until I cried.  Anyone walking past my car would have thought I’d totally ‘flipped out’, as the teens in my day would say.  Later when I reported my encounter to my husband, he said, “If the King of the Universe wants to use the word ain’t to get your attention, I suppose He can.” The rest of the story is, my infection immediately disappeared and has never returned.  I’ve gone through tree winters thus far without even a sniffle.

Jeremiah 29:11 indicates that God knows the plans He has for me.  My minutes, hours, days, weeks, months or years are just that–numbers.  Inconsequential numbers.  Only today matters.  This is the lesson God wishes for me to learn.  Because for the Great I Am everyday is today.  My life’s task is to learn to live in God’s time–today–not according to a manmade calendar.

“Teach me to trust, to live in your time, not mine. Teach me to treasure each and every moment living in Your presence.  And oh, yes, dear Father, You can use the word ain’t anytime You desire.  Just speak to me, Lord.  Speak to me.”

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6 Responses to Ain’t Ain’t Proper

  1. Barbara Bolton says:

    Miss “Special Kay”, I just wish to thank you for the encouraging thoughts to ring in 2014! Remembering that “He makes ALL things beautiful in HIS TIME” is a theme I hope to repeat daily throughout the year. So thankful you are still here to celebrate and looking forward to hearing from you many more times throughout 2014! God continue to bless you!

  2. Ruth Redding Brand says:

    Hi Kay,

    I loved your encouraging, upbeat evaluation of the “three-score and ten.” I’ve been there and done that. Frankly, it was a difficult birthday for me. Seventy? Who, me? I didn’t want a big deal made of it–didn’t want to call others’ attention to this particular milestone, but I did want to commemorate it. So…to make a long story short, I invited some friends who enjoy music to come to my home. It was, fortuitously, a Friday evening. One brought his guitar. We sang all the old hymns and some not-so-old choruses, on and on. And we had pizza and salad. Finally, my husband brought out a beautiful cake, and only then did people know it was my birthday. It was perfect. Since then, I’ve faced accumulating birthdays with equanimity. As my days, so shall my strength be, to paraphrase a favorite text. I still don’t like the consequences of aging; the accumulation of years leads inevitably to death, and that was never God’s plan. But I am so grateful for each day He gives me, and you have reminded me once more to live each day with grace and gratitude. Thank you. (Ruthie Redding Brand)

    • pepsi7 says:

      Time is manmade. God is beyond it. That’s where He wants us to be too. Sound enticing, doesn’t it?

    • pepsi7 says:

      Great hearing from you, Ruth. As I always say, I like the view better on this side of the grass, at least until God reveals other plans for me.

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